My previous post makes me think a lot. Here is another interesting question that I would like to bring out.
Do you choose your partner based on the criteria set or the 'so-called' feeling?
Everyone has their benchmark and basic "requirements" set in their mind on how they would like their partner (boyfriend/girlfriend) to be. For example:
- must be taller than you
- caring
- bright future
- hardworking
- taking different course from you
- come from the same state and etc...
I believe you have at least one that pop up in your mind now. So, do you fall in love with someone because he/she fulfil the criteria set? This is what we called conditional love relationship.
Love is blind or rational? I think most of you would say love is blind, but if you try to look at the root cause, don't you get attracted by him/her at first is because he is the one that you have set in mind. Only then it's been developed into the love relationship and you started to be in the stage of 'love is blind'.
On the other hand, if you say that love is based on the 'so-called' feeling, how would you identify and confirm that? Your mind get blank when you see him/her? or your heart beats will just get faster and you couldn't breath well? All these characteristics or symptoms are what we learnt through the movie or drama, but does that really occur in real life. In fact, it's not. It may be true few years back but as people started to know more about this, the true feeling may not be true. Sounds confusing? Let me show you another clearer example. When psychologist reveals that those people who always hold their arm in front of them indicates that they are very protective and as more and more people starts to realize this fact, they will start to control themselves from doing it. This ends up that those people who are protective about themselves may not always hold their arm in front of them. Get the idea of it? Now, let's apply this back to the previous situation. When we started to realize the fact that if you have fall in love with him/her, your heart beats will get faster when meeting up with him/her then subconsciously you'll make your hear beats get faster although you do not know if you like him/her or not. It's just because that you think you should have those symptoms. So now, how could you really know that the 'so-called' feeling is true?? I do not know, this is what I'm trying to search for recently.
In contrast, do you think feeling is the one could drive both of you to be together forever? Feeling is very subjective and abstract. If it can come at a moment, it may leave at the next moment. It's all happen within that MOMENT! Pak~~ Here it is. And Pak~~ There it goes~~
Furthermore, when I see my friends start to get into a relationship and all the sweet moments they have, I am happy for them to find their love one. In the relationship, promise made and some of them end up separated. Within a year, they get into a new relationship again with another girl/guy. I know the fact that they should move on and not to stay at the same location. However, what trigger me is how could they recover so fast? (although a year may not be short) Some commented that they do not forget what happen in the past relationship just they they lock it in a corner of their hearts. Still, if you do not fully forget about that person then do you think it's fair for your current partner?
I know this post consists of a lotss of question but the gist of this post is to make you think! Who is the one that you really want (or LOVE perhaps)? Is it really based on criteria or feeling?? How could you get over it? All this feeling and curiosity of mine may due to my zero experience on this.
